Ah, the French Assembly, where the greatest minds of diplomacy gather to dissect the complexities of American politics with the precision of a lost recipe. Monday, March 3rd, it seems, is the day of reckoning, as they brave the Trump storm with the same fervor as a Sunday tea party with no tea. It’s high time the French politicos stop their endless pontifications and take a stand—though one wonders if their feet are even on the ground. And poor Jean-Louis Bourlanges, once the shining beacon of foreign policy acumen, now sighs like a grandparent watching a grandchild’s epic video game fail. ‘None of them offers a very clear analysis of Trumpism,’ he laments. Perhaps they’re too busy trying to understand why ‘Make America Great Again’ might not involve moving to France. As for a European defense response, it’s clear: the French need to find a new sport, because the one they’re playing is ‘Keep America in the Cold War.’