Jon Cooper, the Canadian hockey coach, seems to have a ‘frosty’ perspective on international relations, just like the chilly diplomatic ties between Canada and the U.S.! It’s truly commendable how they’re downplaying the political tensions, which are as thick as the fog over the Great Lakes, while they’re trying to score goals. It’s like saying ‘let’s focus on the game’ when the rink is surrounded by snowed-in fans waving American flags and Canadian flags in a frosty standoff. The ‘process’ they have to go through to win, eh? More like navigating through a diplomatic minefield with skates on. And Sidney Crosby, the hockey captain, talks about national pride like it’s an ice sculpture in a heatwave. It’s a ‘hockey-proud country’, he says, but I’d say their pride is a bit like the pride of a penguin in a hot tub—awkwardly out of place. As for the American team, they’re all in it for Trump, it seems. They’re not just playing for the love of the game, but for a presidential seal of approval! It’s a ‘pretty big deal’ for them to chat with Trump, just like it’s a big deal to eat a slice of pizza when you’re already stuffed. The whole thing is just one big political spectacle on ice, wrapped up in a flag-fest of frosty relations.